Black Sun 018: Vampires and Laundry (Original Draft)


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“I think I’ll get my vag pierced.”

“You what?” Julian blinked with a start, turning to stare across her living room coffee table at Angela who was now bursting in to raucous laughter.

“Nothing. You were staring so hard at the fireplace, I just wanted to see if you were in some kind of trance or something.” Angela smirked, resuming turning the pages of her book. It wasn’t a school book, like it SHOULD have been, considering they were both supposed to be studying for class quizzes, but one of the volumes she stole from the library. Julian couldn’t even read the thing, but Angela seemed to be going through it with minimal pauses to flip through a dictionary. Around her were scattered bits of paper with scribbled notes, a few notebooks and several folders. If Julian tried to take a look at any of them she got her hand slapped.

Luckily for Angela, Julian had her own mess of homework to deal with, so her curiosity was buried under pages of Geometry. Julian hated Geometry. Which was probably why she had been staring at the fireplace lost in her own thoughts.

“I was just thinking about stuff is all.” she muttered, turning back to her paper.

“Yeah, me too. Do you think vampires do their own laundry?”

Julian glanced up in confusion. “Do what?”

“Laundry. They’re always wearing clean clothes, so they gotta right? But I’m having a hard time picturing some broody bastard dragging around a pile of dirty clothes.”

“Are you serious?” Julian asked, though she really meant are you drunk.

Angela looked completely serious, in fact she seemed to have put a lot of thought in to it, cause now she was launching in to an explanation. “Yes, listen. Can you imagine Michael doing his own laundry? Just standing by the washer waiting for the rinse cycle to end so he can toss things in the dryer? Do you suppose he and Leo took turns doing laundry? Did they just drop stuff off at the dry cleaners while traveling? What if he ordered Leo to do all the laundry and out of spite Leo shrank all his fancy clothes. He probably did his own laundry after that. Michael meticulously folding all his underwear to put back in his drawers.”

Somewhere in the middle of this completely insane tirade Julian had started laughing and she couldn’t stop. Angela cocked an eyebrow, not finding this so humorous – well okay, maybe it WAS funny in context – but this was a for real question! “All right, laugh it up! When I find out a vampire’s greatest weakness is fabric softener, you’re going to be glad I asked all these weird questions.”

“I’m not the one you need to be asking that one.” Julian finally managed to get out between snickering.

Angela smirked wide. “You’re right. I’ll shoot them a text in a second. Do you want something to drink?” She was already getting up off the floor and heading towards the kitchen even as Julian shook her head.

Julian then reached across the table to snatch up Angela’s iPod to scroll through for some studying music. Her brows furrowed at the track list. “Jesus christ, why are all the songs on here about sex?” she called out.

Angela reappeared with a mug in one hand and a piece of paper in the other. “Because sex is pretty much all I think about when I’m not thinking about vampires and psychic problems. Don’t you?”

Julian shook her head. “It’s not something I ever think about. Um, at least not that often. Definitely not a hundred and thirty two songs often.”

That’s when the slip of paper got slapped down under Julian’s nose. Two phrases were scribbled on it.

The first was in a handwriting Angela hadn’t seen before.

Fuck you, make your own coffee. <3

The second, she recognized all too well.

I know where you sleep, you son of a bitch. XO

“Then what’s THAT all about.” Angela asked, trying to keep her cat-eat-canary grin off her face. She plopped back in to her spot, taking a sip of the water, watching as Julian’s face went a bit pink and she pushed the paper off her book.

“That’s my house guest being an asshole. It’s nothing. It sure as hell isn’t SEX Angela, stop looking at me like that!” Julian grumbled.

Angela eyeballed her. “So it’s Leo you’re exchanging the paper equivalent of flirting with?”

Julian set down her pencil to stare back at Angela. She knew when she wasn’t going to get out of something and it was pretty obvious Angela was fishing now. “Okay, go ahead and spit it out.”

“I’m just wondering, you were on the fast track to sexville with Michael, and now all of a sudden you’re slamming on the breaks?”

“I’m happy with where we are right now, it has nothing to do with Leo.” Julian explained. Angela didn’t seem to be buying it and Julian tilted her head back to groan. “…I’m serious! What we have is good, it doesn’t need to be anything else. Maaaaybe sometimes I think about Leo, but that’s really only happening in very weird, very specific situations where pretty much ANYONE would think about kissing. It’s not like I’m sitting around in class or in bed thinking about him all the time.”

“In bed?”

“Angela.”

The blond laughed. “Don’t be so uptight. You’re telling me you never once went through the whole What if? game? Not even ooooonce?”

“Ugh! Fine! What if Leo. First of all, Leo would have to not still be head over heels in love with his dead girlfriend. Which he IS still completely wrecked over and totally unlikely to ever even want to THINK about loving somebody else. Second, I would have to not be with Michael, who is still very much in the picture and my boyfriend, and yes who I DO actually like.”

“Ignoring those two things, Julian. What if Leo?”

“I still couldn’t. Everyone Leo loved has died or betrayed him. I’m going to die, and it’s probably going to be young, sudden, and horrible. I don’t want to be the next person to destroy him.”

Angela mulled it over, resting her chin in her hand as she watched Julian with a curious stare. “But it’s okay with Michael?”

“Michael is- …hrmm.” Julian fell in to a stunned silence. Shifting uncomfortably as her unfocused gaze fastened on something across the room.

“You didn’t think about that, did you.”

“…No, no I didn’t.” Julian admitted. “It’s kinda wrong isn’t it? He’s not like Leo. I think he would work past it pretty quickly. But still…”

“There’s no guarantee that you’re going to die, and it sure as hell isn’t wrong to want to go out in a blaze of boy-groping glory if you ARE. Don’t you think it’s time to tell them, though? Especially if you think there’s something brewing around the corner. Those dumbasses adore you, they’d probably bring down the sky to keep you alive.”

Julian didn’t look convinced. “I can’t. Michael is over protective enough as it is. And Leo is not keen on me digging in to this new vampire mystery. They won’t let me do what I need to do if they’re worried about me dropping dead at any moment.”

“When has anyone ever stopped you from doing something you were hellbent on doing, Julian?”

She grinned. “Never? But let’s not tempt fate now.”

Angela didn’t agree, but she wouldn’t get anywhere on that argument. “Whatever! You brought me a new conspiracy to work with, so I’ll let it slide. I need to get this back to the house and maybe text your boyfriend to let me at his books again. I might be able to charm him in to letting me see some family tree stuff thanks to that vision of yours. If not, Margrit gave me some shit this morning to flip through.” she reached out, grabbing the paper that had Leo and Julian’s silly little notes and added one of her own in hot pink glitter gel.

Hi Leo~ :D

“Can you do this Geometry crap for me before you go?” Julian huffed, glancing down at her homework.

“Fuck you, do your own homework.”

“I know where you sleep too.”

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